Yesterday was a very hard day for me. Big changes happening in my life ... big changes with regard to my career. I went to college and graduated 11 years ago {holy crap ... that long ago?} with a degree majoring in Corrections and minoring in Spanish and Psychology. I interned at a state Probation and Parole Office and went on to get hired there. After two years, we moved half way across the country and I was hired in the state Probation Office here. Two more years went by and I was hired in the federal Probation Office ... you know, where only the best of the best get hired.
After Payton was born three years ago and we received her unexpected diagnosis, I was permitted to cut my work schedule down to four days a week ... to allow for therapy and doctor appointments. Life was crazy during that time ... two parents working nearly full time jobs with two little kids ... I felt like we rarely had quality time to spend with the kids during the week. Quite honestly, I am wondering where the past five years of Mason's life and the past three years of Payton's life have gone ... I think I missed those years!
So along came Addison ... and for the past couple months, I have been on "maternity" leave. Now I have always been a person to whom my career is very important. As crazy as my life was, I never really thought I would take the plunge and stay home with my kids. It was my career, after all. What did I have if I didn't have my career? But ... that is exactly what we have decided I will do ... stay home with our kids. This was a very hard decision for me to make ... to say goodbye to my career ... it brings me to tears. I truly love doing investigations and working in the court system. Now it is no longer.
But ... I know there are three little people here at home that need me much more than my job does right now. And so there you have it. I am excited to be more involved in their daily activities, which is something you can't really do when you are working. I know this is also the right decision for Nika, as her attachment to us is our number one priority right now. Being away from us 10 hours a day wouldn't do much for attachment, so this is a good thing. It is a good thing! Anyone want to throw me a "Welcome to the SAHM club" party? LOL.
BTW ... not many people outside of my little bubble even know I had a career, so many of you are probably surprised right now. And yes, I did this in addition to running my boutique ... which I will continue to do from home. ;)
Wow! I didn't know any of that! That is so great. And yes, welcome to the SAHM club.......
ReplyDeleteWow, that is a big change! Welcome to the club!
ReplyDeleteYAY!!! Welcome to the SAHM club! You will love it! :)
ReplyDeleteBethany, I really wondered if you would end up doing this . . . I had a feeling in my bones! ;) I think it's quite normal that you would have conflicting emotions about it. I hope you find a new and even greater satisfaction at home with your children, albeit different. You have such precious children and I don't think you will regret this decision one bit when you look back on it someday! Congratulations! {{{hugs}}}
ReplyDeleteCongrats! The kids will love you being home with them!
ReplyDeleteWelcome! You will enjoy the extra time with your kids and they will too!
ReplyDeleteBest of Luck!!!! I totally admire you SAHP(arents). HARDEST JOB! But you are totally making the right choice! Your kids will love it! I was lucky enough to stay home for almost 3 years with Koby, and now Chris is home with him and he loves it! The short time in between where we were both working was tough! Great choice! And I just realized....that means more time for blogging!!!! LOL
ReplyDeleteSorry about the sick kids - yuck.
ReplyDeleteIt's hard to make that decision - I'm kind of in the middle of that too. But, I figure Aidan won't be this little forever - so I might as well play ring-around-the-rosie and enjoy it!
I still am so curious about your boutique - how do you do it?
Congratulations! I know it's a tough choice, I remember it well, but I don't regret staying home at all. I was really worried about having to fully depend on DH financially, but I got over it...eventually anyways. I NEVER EVER thought I was the stay at home type, and now here I am. I can't imagine going back to work!
ReplyDeleteCongrats on your new career! I hope you will love it and I am sure your kids will love having you home.
ReplyDeleteWelcome to the club! If you lived closer, I would have you over for a celebration. I decided to stay home after my second baby was about 8 months old. It is a decision I have never regretted! You can always go back to work when your kids are a bit older. So, enjoy this time! It's an adjustment - but a good one!
ReplyDeleteCongrats! Your kids are truly going to love having you around all the time!!!
ReplyDeleteI am so happy for you! I'm sure the decision was hard to make but the rewards will be worth it. We have the best job in the world, us stay at home mom's. I am so glad you have this oppurtunity. Take it and run! You will not regret the TIME spent with your kids. You are an amazing mom and your kids will thank you for it, one day!
ReplyDeleteBlessings,
Meghan
Congratulations, Bethany!! I am so happy for you and proud of you for making this hard decision! You're such a wonderful mommy to those three precious children and they are lucky to have you!!
ReplyDeleteI'm sure that was a hard decision to come to, but I'm sure you will all enjoy being together! Congratulations!
ReplyDeleteSuprised about a career? No. Suprised about what you did for a career? Yes. First, let me say welcome. When Mark graduated, about the same time as Sophie's birth, plus we moved to a new state, we decided that it would be best for me to stay home (at least until all the kids were in school). In a way, I'm guessing you and I may have worked with similar clients, though on the opposite sides of the law. I worked in the domestic violence field for years before staying home. I miss it still, nearly 19 months later, and I'd be lying if I said it doesn't still smart sometimes. However, it was the best decision and I love hanging with my gang. I know it was a carefully thought out choice for you. It will be an adjustment, not just of your time, but of your self identity. Take it easy on yourself and congrats.
ReplyDelete---Jen
I too gave up my career to stay home with my children once we added number 3. I won't lie, it wasn't easy. 3 years later, it's still not easy. From time to time(like last month), I get a job offer.....and it is very tempting. And, I often get "you have a college degree, you should be using it"....which I will admit, makes me feel like crap to hear people say. 3 years later, I just last week hung my college degree back on the wall. Do I think that staying at home is the right decision? Yes, I know it is. It is easy for someone who loved their career? It hasn't always been for me. But, my kids are worth it and I know that we're fortunant to be able to survive off of one income.
ReplyDeleteWelcome to the club! It really is the most rewarding job in the world!
Hey Bethany-
ReplyDeleteI think you made a good decesion as well. When I stayed home I didn't have a "career" so it was no big deal to me. But now I'm in the opposite boat as you..now I have to go back to work and I will have a "career". Funny how life changes but I am SO glad I was able to stay home with my kids fulltime for almost 4 yrs.
You can always go back to work if it doesn't suit ya..i'm sure they'd hire ya back! ;)
Welcome the the SAHM club, you'll get many more benefits and praises than you ever did working. Work will always be there, you can go back to it someday, your kids being little..you can't go back to.
ReplyDeleteYes, If you were closer I would love to throw you a SAHM party.It is all so worth is and just think there is something new every day and your "Bosses" will reward you with many hugs and kisses ;)
ReplyDeleteHope all of your little ones are felling better
Welcome to the club! It is the best career move you could make :). Your investigative skills will come in handy with 3 kids (who took the cookie from the cookie jar?)! Hopefully the pukey's are gone for good now and you can enjoy your family...do you think you will have/adopt more in the future?
ReplyDeleteGood luck with the transition. I'm sure you (and the kids) will love it. Like said above- you could always go back I'm sure.
ReplyDeleteHope the kids are all feeling better by now.
i graduated on january and Elias was born in february so I didnt look for a job, and really decided to stay at home with my boy, but really had good offers and even some of them made me struggle with the SAHM decision, but I knew that my place was here, the thing that helped me was to know that my mom worked really hard (and im thankful for what she gave me) but i didnt have a relatinship with her, she missed so many things, and I knew I didnt wanted to miss anything with my kids
ReplyDeletehugs and congratulations for your decision, and welcome to the club
As a now grandma who worked (a lot) while her girls were little, I would love to have been able to stay at home. Now that they are grown we are starting to enjoy the time with our 2 grandbabies. Cherish that time.
ReplyDeleteI remember getting layed off once and I had a real hard time with identity. Just remember being a mom is a VERY important job!
I too gave up a primo career...everyone thought I was nuts to leave it, including my pediatrician. But like you, my son's life was going by and I was paying someone else to be his mommy. Now after eight children, I can honestly say that I chose the better path and although the initial adjustment was difficult, I do not regret it even for a moment. You are making a great decision both for you and for them. You seem like such a devoted mom.
ReplyDeletesorry to hear about the sickness going around with the kids - hope they are all feeling better.
ReplyDeleteWow there sure are some big changes going on in your life right now. I know it's not an easy decision to make whether to stay home or continue to work. I had fully planned on returning to work a year after I had Kayla, but that first year passed by too quickly and I knew I couldn't go back to work - I didn't want to miss out on her growing up! I do miss working sometimes - bringing in my own paycheck, the adult conversation, getting out of the house etc...there are pros and cons for either decision...I pray you have peace with your decision and enjoy your time as a SAHM!