Excitement. Love. Happiness.

Last night, I sat down to blog.

I wanted to share pictures I took yesterday of my baby sister's belly. I wanted to scream my excitement for a loved one who learned yesterday that she is expecting after several failed intrauterine insemination and in vetro fertilization procedures. I wanted to show the love I felt for my children ... and the happiness I felt knowing that two very important people in my life will soon have that love in their hearts.

And in the midst of me opening up my blog, I watched this video. And I felt sad. I felt defeated. I felt angry. I felt frustrated.

And I no longer cared to share my excitement, love and happiness. Because right then ... I needed to advocate.

But for now ... I would much rather be back in the place I was before I watched that video.

Ahem.

My baby sister is set to give birth to her first child in three days. I use the term baby sister loosely, as she really is only 10 months and 10 days younger than me.

She is having a girl. Olivia Grace.

Shortly after my sister and I gathered to showcase the life growing inside of her, I learned that a loved one had just received news that she is expecting. This comes after a very long journey of infertility, miscarriage and numerous failed procedures. If you have a prayer to spare, please pray that this new life remains safe and healthy in its mother's womb.

Last night, as my husband prepared to take our children upstairs to put them to bed, I was reminded of my intense love for these little people. As I am every night.

Payton is umm, shall I say ... a very strong willed person. I am not sure where she gets that from? As she is being called up the stairs to head to bed, she puckers up and kisses everyone in the house. One round, two rounds, three rounds, four rounds of kisses. She would go all night if we let her.

But seriously ... it isn't easy to tell her to stop. Because watching her shake her little booty across the floor with lips puckered ... well it is the cutest thing.

As she did this last night, it made me so happy to know that this love would soon be felt by two very important people in my life.

And for me ... that is what life is all about.